too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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