I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
The Olympian is in my bed
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
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