drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just took my morning after pill in the library
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
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