He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
17 year olds will be the death of me.
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so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
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And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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