An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Randomize
