4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
17 People Admit the Worst Thing They’ve Done To a Server
Girls should come with a carfax report
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
Most Men Are Unaware Of These 27 Things About A Woman’s Life
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?