are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
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