Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
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