I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
Randomize
