evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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