Its about making memories worth repressing
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
whose parrot is this?
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
Randomize
