I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
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