You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
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