Screwed.edu
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
