I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Randomize
