It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
