hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
I understand Curling. That high.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
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