So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Randomize
