I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
Randomize
