: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
4 words: hood of his car
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
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