Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
25 People Share How They Got Out Of Their Longest Dry Spell
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
21 People Confess Their Craziest Online Dating Experience
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets