I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
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