we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came.
he what???
Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
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