He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Randomize
