oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
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