You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
Randomize