Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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