So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
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