i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
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