so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
