is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
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