After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
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