This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
I need to align my fucking chakras
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
Randomize
