Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
he thought i was a dude.
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
Randomize
