what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
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