I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
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