He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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