I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
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