oh god was she eating orange peels again
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Randomize
