I feel like death. Did you die last night?
Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!
unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
Randomize
