guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize