Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
