I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
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