K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
Randomize
