my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
Randomize
