Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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