Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Randomize
