Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
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