I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
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Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
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He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
did you just send me my own nude
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
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