is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize