as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Randomize
